The weight loss…

The weight loss roller coaster

When we lose weight we expect to feel great! We just reached our goal and dream! Its a great accomplishment but yet many of my clients will lose all their weight and still feel unsatifisied with their life. They wont feel the happiness they expected. They will get a short boost of happiness from the  weight loss but after a few weeks or month the happiness fades. A common question that my clients will ask: I lost my weight why dont I feel better emotionally? My clients will explain that they expected with the weight loss a rise in their self-esteem and happiness but for some this does not happen. Unfortunately, this is more common then we think. Here are some reasons for our lack of happiness:

1. Unrealistic expectations – we assume weight loss would be the end of all of our problems. That weight loss would solve everything. The truth is if you gained a lot of weight, there is a reason behind it. If you lose the weight but dont deal with the reason you gained the weight in the first place, you wont feel happier and the odds are you will gain the weight back.  Example: I have clients who ate due to loneliness. If you diet and lose the weight but dont become more social and get support you wont feel happier and you will eventually fall back into your old habit of eating when you feel lonely. Weight loss is great but always look at the bigger picture.

2. Fear of success – I lost the weight, now what? We are all aware of the fear of failure but I think a lot of my clients never realize you can also fear success. A lot of clients dont know what their next goal will be? They have put so much effort into their weight loss that they dont know who they will be as a thin person. What will be their new identity? Make sure to know who you are as a person. Your weight doesnt equal who you are inside. A lot of my clients identify themselves as being”Fat”. That is who they think they are. They become comfortable with their identity. When you shed punds, you should also shed your past baggage. Start the next chapter of your life.

3. Enjoyment – I have watched some of my clients become so obsessed with dieting and weight loss they never get to enjoy the journey or their accomplishments We need to have positive reinforcement along our path of weight loss. Make sure to reward yourself with praise and even a gift now or then would be great. Recognize your accomplishments, be proud of your hard work. Remember, you deserve to be happy!

4. Media – be careful of the media. TV, Magazines internet, etc all promote that happiness = thin and young people but yet we are all different. Never compare yourself to anyone else. Its a myth that being thin means your happy. I hate to say this but I have “thin”clients who are depressed. Just be you! We are our happiest when we are ourselves. Be true to you!




About Finding your happiness

Diane Lang, practicing therapist, national speaker, educator, and certified positive psychology coach, has her master’s degree in counseling and is an adjunct in psychology at Montclair State University. She has written three books, and has been featured in various publications, and on TV and Internet shows. Diane speaks on various mental and emotional health topics including Happiness, Resiliency, Stress management, Parenting Positive Aging, Anxiety, and Depression in both teens and adults. Diane also specializes in Positive Psychology Positive Education and Positive Parenting. Thousands of individuals have benefited from Diane’s motivational and educational speaking, trainings, and coaching. Her Hands-on approach along with her background, education and experience has proven to be beneficial to all who attend her presentation. To learn more on how you could bring Diane to your organization please email
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