Transitioning – Caught in the gray area

 If your going through a transition of any type you might be feeling stuck in the “Gray area”. When we transition we tend to forget the phases of it.
 
Transition Phases
1. Ending – a transition always starts with an ending. Think in your life what endings are you going through? Is it a phase like Mid-life or Quarter life crisis? or a divorce/break up? loss of a job?
When your ending a part of your life, you need to grieve the old phase of life. Without grieving and accepting the change you can’t move forward. Grieving is a normal, natural process of life. There is no time frame for grief. The best treatment for grief is support.
2. Gray area– this is the in-between time when you haven’t quite ended your old phase. Your still holding on to some parts of it and your not quite sure where you are going. This time can be frustrating and confusing. We tend to fear change so for a lot of us the gray area feels like forever. Without a sure path we can fall back into our old phases of life that aren’t working anymore. We go back to this because its comfortable and easier. We know what to expect but if we go back to our old ways/patterns/thoughts nothing will change and we will become stagnate and depressed. Use this time to re-evaluate where you have been and where you want to go. Look for clues/signs that lead you in the right direction like intuition, Deja vu and AHA moments. You can also get clues from your dreams and meditation.
3. Start– with every ending comes a new start – remember what goes up must come down and the same is true in transition. When we end something that means something new is beginning. After we have gone through the “Gray area”, we can start our new phase of life. This will lead to new opportunities, possibilities and second starts.
 
Tips for being caught in the gray area
* Don’t push too hard to get out of the gray area, you are there for a reason.
* Enjoy your time in the gray area, its a time for learning and growth.
* Don’t fear the end it means something better is coming- the end means you have outgrown a situation/person and it no longer is serving you. This is not a negative or positive judgement, it just is. Don’t judge yourself or the other people involved in the change.
* Embrace the new – this is an exciting time. Accept your change with open arms. Be open to all the new possibilities and opportunities coming your way so you don’t miss them.
* Don’t set yourself up for failure with unrealistic expectations – if anything go with the flow, follow your instincts and enjoy.
 
School of Positive Living
 
Wednesday, March 19, 7pm – I’am Enough
Morris Hills Adult School, NJ
Telephone: 973-664-2295
 
Saturday, march 22, 10am – Re-train Your Brain for Success
Brookdale Community College, NJ
Telephone: 732-224-2303
 
Monday, March 24, 7pm – Letting Go of Anger
Union County College, NJ
Telephone: 908-709-7606
 
Wednesday, March 26, 6pm – Letting Go of Anger
Hofstra University, Long Island
Telephone: 516-463-7200
 
Thursday, March 27 & April 3, 6:30pm – Declutter Your Life & Reduce Stress
Princeton Adult School, NJ
Telephone: 609-683-1101
 
Monday, March 31, 7pm – Re-train Your Brain for Success
Ramsey Adult School, NJ
Telephone: 201-327-2025
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About Finding your happiness

Diane Lang is a Therapist, educator, author and life coach. Diane has two books: Baby steps the path from motherhood to Career and Creating balance & finding happiness. Diane works as a Therapist and also is an adjunct at Montclair State University. This blog will help educate and empower you to live your best life! For more information please visit her website: www.dlcounseling.com
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