The importance of self-care

The Importance Of Self-Care:
By: Diane Lang

If I wake up in a good mood, that affects everyone around me.

– If I wake up happy, I will treat the first people I see with a smile, a warm touch and eye contact. I will be an active listener to my kids, significant other and all who see me will be affected by my happiness.

– As I enter work, I’m automatically more productive and creative then the unhappy workers. I want to be at my job, socialize and mentor. This makes my work experience good and my fellow employees can reap the benefits.
– As I spend my evening with my friends, family and/or co-workers they can see the happiness by my warm welcome, big smile and laughter. We can all have fun doing whatever we want, as long as the atmosphere is warm and loving.
– Right before I go to sleep, I remind everyone how much I love them so we all end on a good note. As a person filled with joy and love, this is what I feel obligated to do.
– Moods and emotions are contagious. The happier I am, the more I spread my mood, vibe and energy to others. This leads a chain reaction of positivity.
– So when you think your self care or happiness isn’t important, re-think it. Your happiness could be the smile that makes someone’s day brighter, your creativity could spark brand new ideas at your job and your fun loving, caring, active listening self could make someone feel heard and cared for.
– Your happiness can affect so many people in one day. Let’s keep spreading the joy and watch the world get kinder.

FEBRUARY 2017:
February 2017 Workshops Open to the Public
 
Thursday, Feb 2, 10:30am – Living a Mindful Life
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-744-0500 ext 2224
 
Tuesday, Feb 7, 10:30 – Create Balance & Relieve Anxiety
Mount Saint Mary College, NJ
Register: 845-565-2076
 
Thursday, Feb 9, 7pm – Positive Psychology
Kareboost Health Center, Somerset,NJ
Register: 732-860-5273
 
Sunday, Feb 12, 2pm – Emotional Detox – Dealing with Negative People – Free Workshop
Long Hill Public Library, NJ
Register: 908-647-2088
 
Thursday, Feb 16, 10:30am – Healthy Relationships with Your Adult Children
Mount Saint Mary College, NY
Register: 845-565-2076
 
Tuesday, Feb 21, 6:30pm – New Year, New You
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-744-0500 ext 2224
 
Wednesday, Feb 22, 6:30pm – Letting Go of Anger
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-744-0500 ext 2224
 
Monday, Feb 27, 10:30am – Prioritizing Your Life
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-744-0500 ext 2224
 
Monday, Feb 27, 7pm – New Year, New You
Ramsey Adult School, NJ
Register: 201-327-2025
 
ABOUT DIANE LANG:
Diane Lang – Positive Living Expert, life coach and psychotherapist – is a nationally recognized speaker, author, educator, therapist and media expert. Lang is extremely mediagenic and offers expertise on a variety of health and wellness topics about creating balance and finding happiness through positive living as well as multiple mental health, lifestyle and parenting needs. In addition to holding multiple counseling positions, Diane is also an adjunct at Montclair State University.
Lang has been interviewed for numerous magazine and newspaper articles and has been a frequent guest on radio and TV shows including “Fox & Friends” on the Fox News Network. Lang a regular featured expert on the “Expat Show” broadcasted weekly on the New York ABC affiliate WTBQ-AM, and a Blogger.

Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, dream life, Goals, Gratitude, growth, happiness, Intention, Joy, life coaching, love, Mindfulness, non-credit courses, Parent, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, self help, self-care, spirituality, therapy, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Getting off Autopilot

Getting Off Autopilot:
By: Diane Lang

 I just came from vacation that happened to be over the New Year’s weekend. I made a mental list of the small changes I wanted to make in the New Year and started these changes while I was away. That included, less technology time and eating healthier!

I figured I had a good start, but when I walked in the door of my home, my old habits came right back. Within a few hours of being home, I noticed myself sitting in my bed, on social media, while snacking on chips.  What I realized is that as soon as I got home, I went right back onto autopilot.  I was just doing without awareness. I did my old habits without thinking. It’s right then that I realized the real small changes (not that small but doable) I need to make is to become more mindful. To pay attention to what I’m doing. Instead of living on autopilot, I need to live in the present moment and be conscious of what I’m doing, and then make the changes I want.
So instead of spending time on social media, I took out a book that I have been wanting to read and took a nice hot bath. As for the snack, I realized at 8pm I don’t need a snack and if I was in the present moment, I would say no!
So for the New Year, instead of setting our usual resolutions, let’s be more mindful in the New Year and stop the autopilot and take control.

Check Out Diane’s New E-Book:
Cultivating Happiness – 7 Steps To a Happier Life on Scribd!
You can order the book on the link below:

https://www.scribd.com/book/332619668/Cultivating-happiness-7-steps-to-a-happier-life

Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, dream life, Goals, Gratitude, growth, happiness, Intention, Joy, life coaching, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, New Years, Parent, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, psychology, Resolutions, self help, spirituality, therapy, transitions, Uncategorized, workshops | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Questions for the New Year!

Questions For The New Year:
By: Diane Lang
Questions For The New Year:

To change your life whether it’s New Years or just a day in the summer, you need to be fully aware of who you are, what’s working and not working? You need to be aware of what parts of your life you like and don’t like. What limitations have you set up? What beliefs you’re holding onto that are not serving you?

Take some time this January to evaluate your life and become aware of what you feel as you do this evaluation.

Look at your life in 2016 and ask yourself: “What worked?” “What didn’t?” “What emotional obstacles came up?” “What wall do you keep hitting?” “What belief system isn’t working for you?” “What people in your life are holding you back?”

What character traits do you need to work on to have the life you want? Such as strength, courage, confidence, vulnerability, risk taking, patience, persistence, etc.

What character traits do you have currently that hold you back? Example: perfection, control, fear, lack of communication, multi-tasker, etc.

The question to ask with every person, every situation: Is this person or situation making me want to be a better person?

Are you stuck living In you past? Holding on to your baggage?

Are you antipacting your future and causing more worry and fear? Are you afraid of the future so you live in avoidance or denial?

Do you ask for a miracle everyday? Are you looking for small miracles everyday? There is always a miracle happening. Are your eyes open to see them and your heart to feel them?

Are you addicted to fear? Social media? Food? Caffeine? Alcohol? Sugar? Shopping? Gambling? etc. What addictions are holding you back from being your personal best?

With every situation, do you ask yourself: “Am I doing the best I can? Am I being the best person I can be?”

Am I answering every question, making every choice/decision based on love or fear?

Am I taking daily risks? Am I feeling the mix of nervousness and excitement all in one by challenging myself, taking a risk, stepping outside of my comfort zone?

Am I in a state of complaining? Unhappiness? Victim mode? If so, it’s time to walk away from those states of minds? Time to shift your thinking.

Am I open to new possibilities and opportunities?

Am I open to others? Being vulnerable? Authentic?

Am I judgmental towards myself? If I am towards myself, I am towards others. Being judgmental only brings fear. It stops us from seeing the big picture.
It stops us from learning lessons which we need to stop patterns and beliefs that don’t work for us.

Take some time to answer these questions. Be honest.
Happy New Year!
Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, dream life, Goals, Gratitude, growth, happiness, Holiday stress, Intention, Joy, life coaching, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, New Years, pay it forward, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, psychology, Resolutions, self help, spirituality, therapy, transitions, Uncategorized, values | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

My commitments for the New Year


My Commitments For The New Year:
By: Diane Lang 
 1. To bring love to every connection/interaction.
 2. To really listen by being an active and empathetic listener. Let the person know they are heard.
 3. Make every decision based on love instead of fear.
 4. Be grateful: Say at least 1-2 things your grateful for and say “Thank You” often.
 5. Always be in service.
 6. Using your passion to help others. Be aware of what parts of your life bring passion. Have a life full of meaning.
 7. Step out of your own way. When we spend too much time on ourselves, we can get wrapped up in the negative and everything that is going wrong in our lives. Instead, step out of your own way and focus on others.
 8. Being open to new possibilities and opportunities. Don’t let fear stop you.
 9. Meditate, deep breathes, stop and be still, be observant, be without judgment.
 10. Forgiveness for others and for yourself. (This is my toughest commitment.)
 11. Follow your bliss – What makes you happy? Follow it. When we are happy, we spread the happiness.
 12. Believe in miracles: be open and aware.
Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, dream life, Goals, Gratitude, growth, happiness, Holiday stress, Intention, Joy, life coaching, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, New Years, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, psychology, Resolutions, self help, spirituality, therapy, transitions, Uncategorized, values | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dealing with the holiday blues

The Holiday Blues: 

By: Diane Lang 
 
The holidays are portrayed as a time of joy and love but for some, it’s a time of stress and depression. Believe it or not, the holidays can be one of the most depressing times of the year.  The holiday blues can be triggered by overeating, unrealistic expectations, over drinking, lack of time, seasonal changes, loneliness, conflict with family, etc.
 
Here are some of the signs of the holiday blues:
Stress
Fatigue
Financial stress
Sadness
Loss of interest in socialization and activities that were once pleasurable
Low energy
Change in eating and/or sleep habits
Physical symptoms such as stomach problems, headaches, grinding teeth, etc.

 If you’re starting to notice the holiday blues, here are a few tips to help you find some holiday cheer!

1. Are your expectations for the holiday season realistic?   We look at social media, watch the holiday shows and we set our expectations to match what we are seeing. Instead take the holiday season, one day at a time and just enjoy the present moment.
When we set unrealistic expectations or compare ourselves to others, we end up feeling worse.

 2. Support System: This is the time to keep in touch with loved ones. If you can’t meet in person, spend some time chatting over the phone.

3. Extra Support: If you notice a pattern of the holiday blues then prepare by setting up a professional support system for the holidays. Whether it’s a therapist or life coach, make sure your support system is intact for the holidays.

 4.  Let go of the unimportant things: Don’t worry about the things that really don’t matter like the having all the holiday decorations, the perfect place settings or the perfect gift. Instead remember what’s truly important – connecting to others!

5. Triggers: Prepare for the holiday season by knowing what and who triggers your stress or brings up past baggage. Set up limitations and boundaries that are healthy for you.

 6. Pay it Forward: We feel better when we help others so take some time this holiday season to do random acts of kindness for friends and family members. Volunteering is another way to lift your spirits and others. It’s a win-win!

 7. Schedule: Keep your schedule/routine. When we stay in our routine, we feel a sense of comfort and normalcy. Keep your exercise and meditation routine or any other daily rituals that keep you grounded.

 8. Don’t beat yourself up during this time of year: Actually, try to never do this. For many of us, the dreaded self talk we have is on autopilot. We don’t even notice or pay attention to these negative thoughts. For this holiday season and new year, let’s change that. Be aware of your negative self talk and remind yourself to stop it! When I hear my negative thoughts, I say to myself: Stop! These thoughts do not serve me.

 Happy Holidays!!


DECEMBER 2016:
December 6, 7pm – Create Balance & Relieve Anxiety
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Phone: 973-744-0500 ext 2224

December 8, 7pm – Retrain Your Brain for Success
Princeton Adult School, NJ
Phone: 609-683-1101

December 18, 7pm – Living a Mindful Life
Emerson Community School, NJ
Phone: 201-262-5502
ABOUT DIANE LANG:
Diane Lang – Positive Living Expert, life coach and psychotherapist – is a nationally recognized speaker, author, educator, therapist and media expert. Lang is extremely mediagenic and offers expertise on a variety of health and wellness topics about creating balance and finding happiness through positive living as well as multiple mental health, lifestyle and parenting needs. In addition to holding multiple counseling positions, Diane is also an adjunct at Montclair State University.
Lang has been interviewed for numerous magazine and newspaper articles and has been a frequent guest on radio and TV shows including “Fox & Friends” on the Fox News Network. Lang a regular featured expert on the “Expat Show” broadcasted weekly on the New York ABC affiliate WTBQ-AM, and a Blogger.

Lang speaks to employees of large companies to help reduce stress in the workplace and speaks to parents about how to create balance and find happiness along with a variety of other health and wellness topics. For rates or to book Diane Lang contact DLcounseling2014@gmail.com
Diane is also the author of two books: “Baby Steps: The Path from Motherhood to Career” and “Creating Balance and Finding Happiness.
Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, Goals, Gratitude, growth, happiness, Holiday stress, Intention, Joy, life coaching, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, New Years, Parent, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, psychology, self help, spirituality | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

6 Tips for creating a morning routine

Morning Routine: It sets the tone for the day. How do you want to spend your day?  Create the type of day you want with a great morning routine.
6 Tips For Creating A Morning Routine For Success

1. Wake up and the first thing you do before getting out of bed, try to remember and visualize a great memory and feeling in your life. It can be something small. For instance, remember how you felt yesterday having the best cup of coffee or sitting outside in the sun and how the heat felt good on your body. Sit and reflect on this moment, use your senses, feel it, smell it, hear it. This doesn’t take more then 3-5 minutes.

 2. Match that feeling with an intention. What intention comes out of those feelings and memories. Was it a feeling of peace, excitement, contentment, joy, etc?  Whatever feelings come up for you from that memory let it be your intention.
 For example: I woke up and remembered being outside in Florida on vacation, the with the sun beating down on me and the heat relaxing me. It created a feeling of peace and joy.  My intention was to have a joyful and peaceful day.
 When the intention matches the vision then it’s time to start your day. You have now set up the day for the positive, for success.
 3. If all of that doesn’t leave you with the right feeling, then do a morning dump!
 (Not what you’re thinking, get your head of that gutter!)
Keep a dump journal next to your bed and pull it out and do a full release by writing down whatever you’re feeling and holding onto. Sometimes we need a little release before the intention sets in and that’s ok, some days come with a little more clutter but we have the power to release the clutter and stay in a state of positive intention. So, dump if you need to. You can then rip that piece of paper out of the book and rip it to shreds and release it or  hold on to it, the choice is yours just don’t hold on to the clutter mentally and emotionally.
4. Start the morning with some physical positives. Whether it’s a morning walk, the gym, yoga, meditation, a healthy breakfast, two glasses of water, etc. Make sure we take care of our bodies.

5. Set your goals for the day- write down what goals you need to accomplish during the day and at least one goal that will help you accomplish your long term goal.
6. Smile: Seal your morning routine with a big smile from ear to ear.
 Bonus: In the morning, add in a gratitude check. Say or write 1-2 things I’m grateful for.

All of the tips I give are fun. It might sound like a lot, but you will realize that as  you do them, they will bring joy and serenity into your life, they never feel like a struggle.

NOVEMBER 2016:
Tuesday, November 29, 7pm – Dealing with Negative People
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Wednesday, November 30, 7pm – Stress Less, Savor More
Emerson Community School, NJ


DECEMBER 2016:
December 6, 7pm – Create Balance & Relieve Anxiety
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Thursday, December 8, 7pm – Retrain Your Brain for Success
Princeton Adult School, NJ
Phone: 609-683-1101

Monday, December 18, 7pm – Living a Mindful Life
Emerson Community School, NJ
ABOUT DIANE LANG:
Diane Lang – Positive Living Expert, life coach and psychotherapist – is a nationally recognized speaker, author, educator, therapist and media expert. Lang is extremely mediagenic and offers expertise on a variety of health and wellness topics about creating balance and finding happiness through positive living as well as multiple mental health, lifestyle and parenting needs. In addition to holding multiple counseling positions, Diane is also an adjunct at Montclair State University.
Lang has been interviewed for numerous magazine and newspaper articles and has been a frequent guest on radio and TV shows including “Fox & Friends” on the Fox News Network. Lang a regular featured expert on the “Expat Show” broadcasted weekly on the New York ABC affiliate WTBQ-AM, and a Blogger.

Lang speaks to employees of large companies to help reduce stress in the workplace and speaks to parents about how to create balance and find happiness along with a variety of other health and wellness topics. For rates or to book Diane Lang contact DLcounseling2014@gmail.com
Diane is also the author of two books: “Baby Steps: The Path from Motherhood to
Posted in adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, dream life, Goals, growth, happiness, Intention, life coaching, Meditation, Mindfulness, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, psychology, Resolutions, self help, spirituality, transitions, Uncategorized, workshops | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

8 ways to De-stress for the Holidays

 

8 Ways to De-Stress During the Holidays

 

Everyone knows that the holidays can be a stressful time of the year. There’s a lot of planning that goes on for family get-togethers, holiday parties, dinners, and even traveling. The conflicts that are bound to arise bring up mixed feelings and can lead to stress and anxiety. However, the holidays can also be a time to reflect on all of the good things you have in your life and enjoy spending time with your close friends and loved ones. If you’re prone to holiday stress once November comes around, try following these eight tips.

Start early

 

One of the best ways to avoid holiday stress is to start planning early! This means making to-do lists, grocery lists, getting a head start on your gift shopping and more. When you wait until the last minute to do these things, that’s when the stress really gets to you. You can avoid all of that by just making a few lists early on and taking time to complete them a few tasks at a time instead of all at once.

 Take care of you

When you’re starting to feel overwhelmed by all of the tasks you have to do and by the idea that you will soon have to spend time entertaining your large, extended family, create some personal time to relax. Make time in your schedule to do whatever it is that makes you happy, whether it’s a day at the spa, snuggling under the covers and reading a good book, or enjoying a glass of wine before bed. Some solitary time is important and it’s good to indulge every once in a while.

Be up front financially

Money is another big factor in holiday stress since most people plan to buy presents for the family, cook dinner for a group, and even host big parties. The holidays are always a tough time financially and you shouldn’t spend money that you don’t have and can’t afford to be spending. If money is tight, create a strict budget for yourself and make sure to stick to it. Consider buying presents only for the kids, doing a Secret Santa /Yankee Swap for the adults, or even use your creativity to make some homemade gifts.

Get some exercise

Getting active and doing some form of exercise does wonders for relieving stress. Even going for a brisk walk for 30 minutes a day can be extremely beneficial. Grab a neighbor or a friend to accompany you so you can talk while you’re on the move and you won’t even realize that what you’re doing is exercising. If possible, get the whole family involved in a family walk so they can all benefit from lower levels of stress.

Ask for help

If you’re the person in the family who is doing all of the planning, all of the cooking, and all of the shopping, you really should consider asking for help. No one can be expected to do so many things at once so learn to delegate tasks to others. Ask family members to each bring a different dish to dinner to relieve some of your cooking duties. Everyone should be doing his or her part to help out, even during clean up.

 Gratitude

 The holidays are really about spending quality time with your friends and family. It’s not about the presents, or the food, or the parties. We should feel grateful and happy for our health and for being surrounded by loved ones. These are lessons to pass on to your children and teach them to appreciate all of the little things in life that make us happy.

Watch the signs

Listen to your body. If you are noticing any of the following signs then it’s time to make changes:

 

  • Change in sleeping habits
  • Change in eating habits
  • Feeling irritable, moody and unhappy
  • Exhaustion and fatigue
  • Panic attack symptoms like dizziness, heavy chest, heart racing, headache, feeling nauseous, hot and cold flashes
  • Physical signs such as headaches, stomachaches, joint pain and low immune system – catching frequent colds and illnesses.

 

These symptoms are all warning signs of too much stress and anxiety in our life. This is a sign to slow down and take a time out.

Pay it forward

 

For the holidays join a local charity and help with serving dinners, dropping off presents and giving hugs. Every time we do a random act of kindness we help others while helping ourselves. Random acts of kindness give a boost of happiness that lasts 24-72 hours. Spread the joy!

 

Diane Lang, MA
Counselor Educator and Certified Life Coach
For more information please visit: http://www.dlcounseling.com or email DLCounseling2014@gmail.com

 

Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Conscious living, counseling, development, Goals, Gratitude, growth, happiness, Holiday stress, Joy, life coaching, love, Mindfulness, Parent, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, pro-active, psychology, self help, therapy, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment