Finding your happiness

What we Need is Hope

Posted on April 6, 2020 by Finding your happiness

What We Need Is Hope

By: Diane Lang

In these recent days where it’s easy to get stuck in the darkness, where can we find the light?

How do we find hope?

By being silent and asking for help.

Then, being silent again to listen to what comes to us.

Hope is natural, it’s inside of all of us, it’s just a matter of connecting to it again.

You can find hope when you are inspired by someone.

When you hear a good-feeling story.

When we see the big picture.

When we connect to others and realize we are not alone.

When we take risks and step out of our comfort zone.

When we accept ourselves for who we really are.

When we learn something new.

When we see someone do something for others.

When we stop thinking about ourselves and think about others, the world.

When we make changes.

When we learn something new.

When we connect to gratitude.

When we connect to the good we have done and we feel a sense of accomplishment and pride.

When we are curious and find interest in something.

From everyday miracles like the sunrise and sunset, babies and animals.

When you take the time to see how far you have come.

When you look at the past and see how you have thrived through challenges.

When you pay it forward and make someone else smile.

Every time we feel love or receive love.

It’s there for the taking.

With the Corona Virus going around, all workshops have been cancelled until April 13th. On this date, we will re-evaluate the situation and hope to get back to in-person learning. Unfortunately, we won’t be able to make up all the workshops but we can offer them from home. All workshops can be done through phone, face-time or zoom. Each workshop will be one hour, include handout and have a Q&A at the end. Each workshop can be scheduled for days, evenings or Saturdays.

Please email me at DLCounseling2014@gmail.com for more information/any questions or to set up your private or group workshop.

I’m also offering private coaching sessions through Phone, Face time or Zoom.

The workshops listed below can all be done virtually:

Stop Taking things Personally

Having Healthy Relationships with your Adult Children

Positive Aging

Positive Psychology- Finding your Happiness

Releasing Anger and Finding Forgiveness

Emotional Detox Dealing with Negative People

Stop the Panic and Anxiety

Stress Less, Savor More

Living a Mindful Life

Coping with Change and Loss

Positive Parenting

Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Commitment, Conscious living, counseling, cultivate happiness, development, dream life, emotional declutter, emotional intelligence, Emotional Toolbox, empathy, fear, Goals, Gratitude, grief, growth, happiness, Human Resources, Intention, Joy, life coaching, loneliness, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, Parent, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive emotions, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, priorities, pro-active, psychology, school, self help, self-care, Soft Skills, spirituality, therapy, Thoughts, toxic people, transitions, Uncategorized, values, working moms, Workplace Wellness, workshops | Tagged anger, anxiety, art, business, challenges, changes, communication, creativity, development, dreams, education, failure, family, grow, happy, health, Hope, inspiration, kids, kindness, learning, life, life lessons, lifestyle, love, military, Mondays, motivation, opportunities, panic, Positive, positive emotions, Purpose, questions, religion, SAD, school, sharing, spirituality, stress, Thoughts, Truth, vision, Women, work | Leave a comment

8 Ways to Prevent the Winter Blue’s

Posted on November 4, 2019 by Finding your happiness

8 Ways to Prevent the Winter Blues Called SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder)
By: Diane Lang

With the clocks being turned back an hour and the days getting shorter, we can experience Seasonal Disorder. This is when people experience a change of moods during the winter months, particularly a feeling of depression and sadness. I have clients who start to feel the winter blues as early as the beginning of October. Typically, when the weather gets warmer, these feelings will begin to lessen. If you are feeling under the weather during the cold winter months but not sure if you are having seasonal disorder, you can check to see if you are experiencing certain symptoms related to the disorder.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) Symptoms:

1. Feelings of sadness, hopelessness and anxiety during the winter months.

2. Feeling fatigue, loss of energy, trouble concentrating and unmotivated.

3. The feelings of sadness, fatigue, isolated, etc. that start out mild and become more severe as the winter progresses.

4. Change in appetite and sleeping habits.

5. Social withdrawal – loss of interest in social activities and hobbies. Some people tend to “hibernate” during the winter months. They don’t leave their house very often during the winter months and they stop socializing and enjoying their daily activities. They start feeling isolated, lonely and depressed. Watch out for this pattern.

“The cause of SAD is still unknown, but we know environmental factors play a big role. “A person who lives in an area near a lake can get ‘the lake effect’ where he gets so much snow and very little sun all winter, resulting in SAD. We also know that SAD can run in the family – genetics play a role. Seasonal affective disorder is more common in women and we usually see symptoms starting in young adulthood.”

Treatment and How to Prevent

There are different treatment options available for SAD and even ways to help prevent SAD or at least the severity of it.

1. Light Therapy – we know that increased sunlight helps improve the symptoms of seasonal disorder. There are certain lights you can buy called “Light Therapy Box,” which mimic outside light and help you lift your mood and spirits.

2. Psychotherapy – a therapist can help you identify your negative thoughts and behaviors and help change them. A therapist can also help you find good coping skills to feel better.

3. Spend some time outdoors to grab some natural light – take a morning or afternoon walk and take time to sit in the sun to help lift your spirits. Even if the weather is cold and snowy, we do know that being outside in the winter months is beneficial.

4. Exercise – every time we exercise, we produce endorphins while reducing stress hormones. This gives us a boost of happiness.

5. Bring the outdoors inside – open up the shades and curtains. Move your desks and chairs near the window to bring the sunlight in doors.

6. Don’t let winter make you feel trapped. Make weekly plans to have fun whether it’s dinner with friends or catching a movie, just make sure to laugh and socialize. Surround yourself with family and friends to give the extra support you need.

7. Plan a vacation where the weather is warm, and the sun is shining. If you feel a sense of isolation and loneliness in the winter months, setting up vacation time in warm, sunny spots can help and give you something to look forward to.

8. Meds – Doctors have prescribed anti-depressants that have worked well for some patients that suffer with more severe SAD symptoms.

For more information please visit Diane’s website: http://www.dlcounseling.com
Email Diane at DLCounseling2014@gmail.com

November + December 2019 Appearances …

Coming soon!

About Diane Lang…

Therapist, Educator and Life Coach
As a Therapist, Educator and Positive Living Expert, Diane has dedicated her career to helping people turn their lives around and is now on a mission to help them develop a sustainable positive attitude that can actually turn one into an optimist, literally.

Through her three books, “Creating Balance & Finding Happiness”, “Baby Steps: the Path from Motherhood to Career” and “ Mindfully Happy- waking up to life.” Diane has been speaking and empowering people nationwide. She is also an Adjunct in Psychology at Montclair State University, where her college work includes mentoring students for personal issue advisement.

As an expert in her fields of therapy, Lang has been featured in the Daily Record, Family Circle, Family Magazine, Working Mother Magazine and Cookie Magazine, seen on NJ 12 TV, Good day CT, Style CT, The Veira Network, CBS TV and “Fox & Friends”. She has also participated in a reality based Internet show, ourprisoner.com, hosted Generation X-tinet.

Posted in adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Commitment, Conscious living, counseling, cultivate happiness, development, dream life, emotional intelligence, Emotional Toolbox, empathy, fear, Goals, Gratitude, grief, growth, happiness, Holiday stress, Intention, Joy, life coaching, loneliness, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, parenting, personal development, positive emotions, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, priorities, pro-active, psychology, self help, self-care, Soft Skills, spirituality, therapy, Thoughts, transitions, Uncategorized, working moms, Workplace Wellness | Tagged anxiety, changes, communication, depression, development, education, Emotional health, emotional wellness, grow, happy, health, inspiration, learning, life, lifestyle, mental fitness, mental health, SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder, stress, Thoughts, Truth, Winter Blues, Withdrawl, Women | Leave a comment

11 Ways to Practice Self-Care Daily

Posted on October 9, 2019 by Finding your happiness

11 ways to practice self-care daily

Self-care is care provided “for you, by you.” It’s about identifying your own needs and taking steps to meet them. It is taking the time to do some of the activities that nurture you. Self-care is about taking proper care of yourself and treating yourself as kindly as you treat others. Self-care is so important, but we seem to put it on the bottom of our priority list. We need to put it on the top of our priority list.

Why take care of yourself first?
You can’t give what you don’t have. Everyone benefits from your self-care. When you feel good emotionally, physically and spiritually, you can be there for others. If not, you run on empty and becomes stressed out, overwhelmed and can burn out.
Mood and emotions are contagious. If your unhappy, it affects others. What do you want to spread to your kids? We teach through actions.
Women who neglect their own needs and forget to nurture themselves often become unhappy, have low self-esteem and feel resentment.
• Remember self-care doesn’t equal selfish
11 ways to practice self-care
1. Are your basic needs met? This is a great place to start. We need a strong physical foundation. Make sure your diet is good, sleeping well, plenty of water and exercise.
2. How do you define happiness? What does it look like? Feel like? Write a list of the top 5-10 things that cultivate happiness for you. Does your life match your list?
3. Gratitude – spending time in gratitude helps us to re-train our brains to go from negative to positive. Ask yourself everyday: What are 2-3 things your grateful for today?
4. Step outside of your comfort zone – when we stay in our comfort zone, we don’t take risks, try new things and we can become stagnate. We need growth to be happy.
5. Flow – add in activities that cause flow. Flow create mindfulness and cultivate happiness.
6. Pay it forward – it’s a win-win. Every time you do an act of kindness, you get a boost of happiness and so does the person you did it for.
7. Unplug and do something for you! Take this time to re-fuel.
8. Learn to say “No”.
9. Ask for help
10. Socialization – connect with others. Socialization is the # 1 factor of happiness.
This includes: Community, Fun/play and Support.
11. Journal write – this is a mindfulness exercise. Take 10 minutes a day to free write. Write without judgment.
For more information please visit Diane’s website: http://www.dlcounseling.com or email Diane at DLCounseling2014@gmail.com

The Questions we all Need to Answer to Create Positive Changes in our Lives

Posted on October 8, 2019 by Finding your happiness

The Questions We All Need to Answer to Create Positive Change in our Lives
By: Diane Lang

We often feel stuck and not sure what our next steps should be. I find it beneficial to stop, evaluate your life presently by asking yourself some very important questions. Write the questions down on a piece of paper. Take some time to honestly answer them. You will be surprised what you learn and what changes it will motivate you to make. Just asking these questions starts the shift for change.
Is what I’m doing helping or harming me? One of the most important questions you can ask yourself.

Is this decision based on love or fear? When we make choices/decisions especially when hurt and angry, we react impulsively. Our decisions becomes based
on fear, hurt, anger and reacting without thinking. Instead take a few minutes and ask yourself the question- is my decision based on love or fear?

Is how I’m feeling about a situation temporary? We jump to conclusions, snap decisions and anger very quickly. What if the situation wouldn’t matter to you in a few days? few weeks? would you still make the same decision? would all the time you spent worrying been worth it?

What good can I find in this bad situation? Even if it’s growth, change or a lesson.

How can I challenge myself today? What risk can I take today? Of course, we feel stuck when we are not taking action to move forward but our fear can paralyze us. Step outside of your comfort zone its where you will find growth.

What will happen if I continue to live this way? If one year from now, my life looks exactly the same as it does today, how will I feel?

What are the top three things that make me happy? How can I incorporate those things into my life? The things in our life that cultivate happiness also give us self-care. Make yourself a priority.

What is my why? Look at all your goals and ask yourself what is they “why” behind them?

What am I truly grateful for in my life? Each day ask what your grateful for that happen today? Really search for those gifts and miracles, it shifts our perspective.

Does my value system and career match? We can’t be happy if our career doesn’t match our inner values.

Is my social circle a positive or negative influence? We are the sum of the people we spend the most time with. Are these people supportive? caring? positive?

What habit do I keep repeating that is getting in my way towards living the life I want? Our habits, beliefs and patterns are formed very early on in our life. They are programmed into our life at such an early age we don’t even realize we have them. They are on autopilot. Become aware of your habits, patterns and beliefs that are not working for you. They are learned so you can unlearn them.

What are you doing today to invest in your relationships? We are social creatures and need others to heal, grieve and forgive. We can’t be happy without love and socialization.
October 2019 – Events and Workshops – Open to the Public

Thursday, Oct 10, 1pm- Retrain Your Brain for Success and Happiness
Arbor Terrace Roseland, NJ
Phone: 973-618-1888

Monday, October 14, 7pm – Stop the Panic
Emerson Community School, NJ
Register: 201-262-5502

Tuesday, October 15, 1pm – Stop the Panic
Mount Saint Mary College – Desmond Campus, NY
Register: 845-565-2076

Tuesday, October 15, 6:30pm – Stop the Panic
Caldwell Continuing Education, NJ
Register: 973-228-2092

Wednesday, October 16, 10:30am – Don’t Take It Personally
Montclair Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-744-0500 Ext.2224

Thursday, October 17, 7pm
– Healthy Relationships with Your Adult Kids
Morristown Community School, NJ
Register: 973-292-2063

Monday, October 21, 7pm – Life after Retirement
Ramsey Adult School, NJ
Register: 201-327-2025

Tuesday, October 22,1pm – Healthy Relationships with your Adult Kids
Livingston Senior Center, NJ
Register: 973-535-7925

Tuesday, October 22, 7pm – Positive Psychology – Finding Your Happiness
Princeton Adult School, NJ
Register:609-683-1101

Wednesday, October 23, 10am – Stop Taking Things Personally
Great Horizons, NJ
Register:973-292-2063

Wednesday, October 23, 7pm – What Kind of Smart Are You?
The Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-443-9222

Thursday, October 24, 6:30pm – Positive Parenting
The Jointure, NJ
Register: 908-722-1563

Monday, October 28, 10:30am – Positive Aging
The Jointure, NJ
Register: 908-722-1563

Monday, October 28, 7pm – Stress Less, Savor More
The Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-443-9222

Wednesday, October 30, 9:30am – Positive Education
Rutgers School of Social Work, NJ
Register: 848-932-8758

About Diane Lang…

Posted in Abundance, adult education, beliefs, Change, coaching, Commitment, Conscious living, counseling, cultivate happiness, declutter, development, dream life, emotional declutter, emotional intelligence, Emotional Toolbox, empathy, fear, Goals, Gratitude, grief, growth, happiness, Human Resources, Intention, Joy, life coaching, loneliness, love, Meditation, Mindfulness, motherhood, non-credit courses, Parent, parenting, pay it forward, personal development, positive emotions, positive parenting, positive psychology, Positive Psychology coaching, priorities, pro-active, psychology, school, self help, self-care, Soft Skills, spirituality, therapy, Thoughts, toxic people, transitions, Uncategorized, values, working moms, Workplace Wellness, workshops | Tagged America, anger, anxiety, art, awareness, back to school, belief, beliefs, Bullying, business, career, challenge, challenges, change, changes, children, clarity, classes, clutter, coaching, college, communication, compassion, confidence, coping, courage, creativity, depression, determined, develop, development, Diet, dreams, education, emotions, Evaluation, expression, failure, family, flow, freedom, Gift, goals, Gratitude, grief, grow, growth, happiness, happy, healing, health, Hope, identity, inspiration, Intention, jobs, journaling, joy, kids, kindness, learn, learning, lessons, life, life lessons, lifestyle, love, Meaning, meditation, mental health, military, Mistakes, Mondays, moods, motherhood, motivation, nature, Old school, open-minded, opportunities, outdoors, pain, panic, parenting, patterns, perception, personal development, Positive, positiveaction, power, praise, professional development, psychology, Purpose, Q&A, questions, Reboot, religion, resolutions, respect, sadness, schedule, school, self talk, self-improvement, sharing, simplicity, Soul, spirituality, spring, story, story telling, stress, stress management, Success, teaching, technology, Thoughts, time management, transition, Truth, vision, volunteer, vulnerability, weight loss, wellness, Women, work, workshops | Leave a comment

Anger is a Healthy Emotion

Posted on September 30, 2019 by Finding your happiness

Anger is a Healthy Emotion
By: Diane Lang

It’s okay to feel anger. It’s normal and healthy . Everyone feels anger, sometimes, even daily.
Anger is a powerful emotion that can help you to express yourself either in an unhealthy manner or in a positive way.
If you use anger as a red flag that something is wrong and make changes, it can be very helpful.
The key is to know if the anger you are feeling is productive and helps you improve your situation or unproductive anger like road rage.
If it’s unproductive, learn the triggers and ways to distract yourself.
What self soothes you? music, calling a friend, meditative breathing, remembering a good memory, etc.
There are always good and bad things going on in the world – it’s what you choose to focus on.

Remember, that anger is a secondary emotion. That means there is something underneath your anger like fear or sadness.
If we don’t deal with the fear, the anger will remain.
Anger is easier to feel, it’s less uncomfortable and vulnerable.
We feel more in control with anger.
Next time you are feeling anger, look beneath the anger.
What is truly going on? Are you really fearful and anxious? or sad ? hurt?
When we know our true emotions under the anger, we can deal directly with the root of the problem.
October 2019 – Events and Workshops – Open to the Public

Tuesday, October 1, 6:30pm – Finding Your Worth and Happiness
Caldwell Continuing Education, NJ
Register: 973-228-2092

Wednesday, October 2, 10:30am – Positive Psychology- Finding Your Happiness
The Jointure, NJ
Register: 908-722-1563

Wednesday, October 2, 7pm – Positive Parenting
Bernard Township Public Library, NJ
Register: 908-204-3031

Thursday, October 4, 10:30am – Stop Taking It Personally
Mount Saint Mary College, Desmond Campus, NY
Register: 845-565-2076

Saturday, October 5, 1pm – Stress Less, Savor More
Purple OM, NJ
Register: 973-343-2848

Monday, October 7, 7pm – Retrain Your Brain for Success
The Adult School, NJ
Register: 973-443-9222

Wednesday, October, 6, 6:30pm – Emotional Detox- Dealing with Negative People
Northampton Community College, PA
Register: 570-369-1881